Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
Randomize
