my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
Randomize
