Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
My balls are so social today.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
I stole a fireplace last night.
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
Randomize
