FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
Randomize
