its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Randomize
