we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
Randomize
