I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
Randomize
