I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
Randomize
