I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
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