Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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