No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Randomize
