I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
Randomize