love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
Randomize
