Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
everyone is single if you try hard enough
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
Randomize