4 words: hood of his car
Mars, I'm going to name my child horatio mars. He will hate me till he gets high. Then he'll understand
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
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