he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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