She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
Randomize
