don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Randomize
