how can u be prego again
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
