Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
Randomize
