There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
*swallows 40 gallons of heavy water and astral projects into buzzfeed* Top Ten Reasons Why I Am God
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
Randomize