How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
No one should have to go to work between Christmas and New Years, but here I am twirling in my office chair and putting Jack in my coffee like I’m back in college studying for finals.
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
Randomize
