DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Randomize
