Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
Randomize
