We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
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