My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
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