he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
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