I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
Randomize
