Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
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