Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
Randomize
