She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
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