Soap is not a condiment
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
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