well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
I managed to convince my mom that my hickey was a birth mark I have always had. She cried for an hour about being a terrible mother for never noticing it.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
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