Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
