good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
Randomize
