I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
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