hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
I chugged vodka from a 15 ft snorkel. What the fuck did you do with your life today?
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
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