so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
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