Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
Randomize
