im gay
i know
yea but for you.
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize