Just mADE A PArabola og urine
party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
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