You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
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