So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
Randomize
