It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
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