life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
Still dying that you shit outside
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
Based on my calculations, I should be blackout by approximately 11:14pm and that's when I need you to take my phone away from me. Mkay?
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
Randomize
