Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
Randomize