If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
Randomize
