not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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