she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
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