Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
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