i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
Randomize
